Psychology: How to make “ambiguous people” like you?

Ambiguous emotions generally have three states.

The first type: Both individuals are single but cannot become a couple

The state of ‘above friendship, lovers not yet fulfilled’ is like this.

They are both single, but there are various obstacles between them; Although they clearly like each other, they deeply understand that they cannot be together.

So, as a last resort, I chose an ambiguous relationship.

The second type: Both individuals are not single, but have an intimate relationship

They both have their own partners, but they are good friends with each other; Do something beyond friendship without telling your partner, like two people probing each other and wanting to find emotional fulfillment in each other.

The third type: cultivating a spare tire type ambiguous

These people adhere to the principle of “not taking the initiative, not refusing, and not accepting”.

They maintain ambiguous relationships with different members of the opposite sex and try to gain enough benefits and value from each other.

For everyone, ambiguity is a helpless, addictive, and irresistible thing.

So, how can ambiguous two people go further in their relationship?

Chatting at the appropriate time can enhance the desire to share. Psychological research shows that:

When people are quiet at night, their emotional fluctuations are often greater. At this stage, chatting with the opposite sex can have unexpected effects.

There is also a fun concept called the ‘dark effect’.

The meaning is: when a person is in a dark environment, emotions flow out like water flowing through an open valve.

Chatting with the opposite sex you like late at night can enhance your mutual affection.

What topics can we talk about?

Firstly, talk about what the other person cares about, not what you care about

This is the primary principle, if you want the other person to like chatting with you more and more, then make them develop a feeling of:

Chatting with you is very comfortable, there is a desire to share, and you always bring him enough emotional value

Secondly, when chatting, guide the other person’s desire to share

How to guide?

For example:

When you talk about food, you can ask him: How is your cooking? What is your favorite food?

Where do you like to travel? What is your attitude towards emotions?

These are just the “introduction” of the topic, aimed at stimulating the other party’s desire to share, and then you can provide opinions and express recognition at the appropriate time.

Thirdly, end the conversation when it’s the most exciting

Remember, it doesn’t mean you have to chat with the person you like every day, because frequent chatting can also easily reduce mystery and lose curiosity.

What you need to do is to make the other person establish enough trust and dependence on you, and occasionally neglect them.

When chatting and feeling unsatisfied, you can say to the other person:

Sorry, I have something else to do. Chatting with you makes me very happy. Let’s continue our conversation tomorrow

The purpose of doing this is to continue the freshness between you and keep your relationship in an active state.

Don’t just chat online, have more opportunities to meet in person

Online chatting is ultimately short-lived, illusory, and not realistic enough.

After all, the other party can chat with you or another person.

If you want to further enhance your relationship and transfer it from online chatting to offline, then you must adopt the method of offline dating.

More meetings, more dates, create more ambiguous atmosphere.

We should love real people, not just love someone through a phone screen;

We need to do specific things with each other instead of chatting online about ideals that we don’t know when we can achieve.

How to date?

For example:

Go visit some art galleries, museums, and museums to add topics for conversation between two people;

Go to scenic spots and amusement parks to relax your relationship;

At the end, you can go to the bookstore and enjoy some delicious food, which will make your emotions go from tension to relaxation, and then from relaxation to a romantic atmosphere.

There is a concept in psychology called the ‘suspension bridge effect’.

The meaning in intimate relationships is:

People who can cause you emotional fluctuations often create strong feelings for you.

Never doubt the power of emotions, which is one of the sources of love.

Stop ambiguity at the right time and actively break the relationship

If two people continue to be ambiguous, this kind of relationship is like ‘hurting the enemy a thousand, self harming eight hundred’, and may not necessarily have a good outcome.

So, you must stop your ambiguous relationship in a timely manner.

How to determine if the ambiguity has reached a point where they can be together?

It depends on whether the other person likes you enough.

For example:

Can he share some private topics when chatting with you?

Share with you his family, past relationships, friends around him, and even some of his own little secrets.

Is he willing to invest enough time, energy, and initiative into you?

These are all standards for measuring emotions.

Remember, the longer the ambiguous phase, the faster the relationship between two people disappears.